The Great Lent is over. Among other restrictions, the wedding ceremonies were mainly not carried out in the meantime. Just a few days later, the month May is coming, and we, so to say, have entered the active stage of spring weddings. When have you last attended the average statistic Armenian wedding? Do you remember what was going on? I and the wedding meet at the churchyard packed by mainly the wedding guests and their varnished cars. I really do not understand how the savage owners of these “cool” cars fit, to put it mildly, inappropriate outfit of the women visiting the church, especially their accessories, in their “truth”. After all, why have your wife received an image of a stripper wearing mesh tights so that you now are looking here and there with a kevlar look as if saying, do not look at her, she is mine? However, this is on the one side, they will change their outfit still for a couple of times, on the other hand, on entering the church they say, My God, I’ll die for you. Have you ever heard what people are talking during the wedding parallel to the priest? Afterwards, they drive in four lines along the street of three lines to a park covered by ice, where in the middle of the winter season, the bride in laced-dress is photographed in all the possible bourgeois positions. Photographing, generally, is the fundamental event of the wedding. The couple is married not for living happily together, but for being photographed.
Anyway, these are minor things compared to the Sodom that is going on at the wedding hall. Dangerous voice, light and an MC, the toast to the fallen soldiers is followed by a rabiz Turkish music, a marasmus poorly copycatted from Arabs, Turks, and some more terrifying American-Armenians, which is called a ceremony. A ceremony of entering, a barbecue ceremony, the flower-throwing ceremony, a cake ceremony, a disco ceremony… I never stay up to the end. No need trying to explain those weddings MCs that there is no ethnic identify culture in all of this and that hardly a happy family can be formed by getting married in such a competitive savagery. They have the crushing argument against it, we are not a “country bumpkin” to follow these thousand-year-old things.
A few years ago, maybe even now, there existed a “country bumpkin”, especially in the Ararat valley area. They were looking for someone the night before the wedding who was going to water the bagh. They were putting an abundance of food with him and unleavened bread as much as possible. The waterman was not able to eat even a percent of this unleavened bread, he was taking it, opening and putting the unleavened bread at the sound of the water and bringing it back in the morning to give to the owner of the wedding. Both during the feast and the following days, the bride and the groom were not eating any other bread. People say that the bread of this bagh was ensuring reconciliation to the couple from the very sources of their mutual life.
Recently, British scientists “revealed” this “country bumpkin.” They proved that the sound of flowing water in the natural environment beneficially changes the structure of atoms of materials located nearby making them even healing. But this is only for British scientists and also “country bumpkins”, the rest can dance hugging the bros tightly under loud “habibi” music and in the end, kissing each other with spittle. It also has its counsel.
AGHASY HUNANYAN
